Steps to Effective Parenting

Being a parent is not an easy job, and bringing up the children in a proper way is even more difficult. Most of the parents are least prepared and often confused about this. For the parents who want to bring up their children more properly and effectively, here are certain steps to effective parenting.

The way you talk or behave with your child plays an important role in developing his/her self-esteem. Praise your child for his/her achievements and allow him to do the things for himself. This will help him/her in developing self-confidence. Never underestimate him/her or pass any bad comments. And the most important one is, do not ever compare him/her with other children.

Remember, your child learns a lot just by observing you. He/she tries to behave or act like you, and this possibility increases when he/she is younger.

Therefore, it is necessary that you model the qualities you want to develop in your child. "ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN THE WORDS", and therefore, instead of speaking, you can teach him/her the qualities like respect, honesty, friendliness, kindness, trust, and tolerance simply by your actions.

Do not use aggressive words or express your anger in front of him/her.

Praise and appreciate your child for his/her good behavior. Catch him/her while doing something right and pass some positive comments. Compliment him/her every day, however small the reason may be.

The comments like "You behave very nicely with elder people" or "You are very good at drawing" will encourage him/her in doing right things. Remember that your compliments, love, and kindness are the greatest gifts that you can offer to your child. Never give negative comments or repeated scolding.

In today's world where both the parents work, it often becomes difficult to give time for the children, which is the greatest gift you can give your child. All the children like being observed and try to do the things by which they can gain others' attention.

But when these children do not get that, they often misbehave as they feel that this is the easiest and quickest way to gain attention. For this reason, it is very important to give some of your quality time to your child. Spend a day with him/her.

You can take him/her to a garden or a restaurant once in a week, probably on weekends. You can even have a breakfast or a dinner with him/her if possible.

Try to make communication your first priority. Be clear with your words. As a parent, you expect a lot from your child, so make your expectations clear. Let your child know what you expect from him/her and why you want him/her to do so. If there are some problems, you should be able to explain it to your child or even ask him/her for suggestions. Let your child participate in the decisions.

No child is the same and you have to adjust your parenting style accordingly. Every child grows at different speeds; one child may have fast growth while the other may have slow. Comparing the two children or keeping high expectations from them may result in frustration.

Therefore, a single parenting style may not work, and you may have to change it according to the child's growth. What works now may not work later, so be flexible.

Let your child know that your love is unconditional, and that even if he/she misbehaves, your love will not change. But this does not mean that he/she can carry over this misbehavior. It is your responsibility as a parent to correct and guide your child properly.

The way you do this also makes a difference. Never blame or criticize your child, instead tell him/her in such a way that he/she knows that even if you expect better next time, your love is still there.